Sunday, March 15, 2009

losin my senses

i dunno if its the summer or the course of events in life. i feel everything collapsing around me this time.. and could be something common to those eyes that have been around me for a long time. people think its a recurring problem i have wit life... DEPRESSION ! :)


well... things are no longer to be the same. and i feel i am no longer poised for those things i thought i needed to achieve. is tat my health ?! or something more to do wit my mind ? :) few questions i need to answer.

As a resultant of frustration i kinda put a stop to my orkut profile. this time i'vent deleted it ... but wont be using it.. perhaps for a LONG time ! for those who need to reach me ... please mail me and u'll get my contact number ! :)

sorry for the BLOG on a standstill !

Saturday, February 21, 2009

the 600 second DASH ..


The quickest ever...

Now people found some parts of it reminiscent of the previous works... some found it totally different ! :)

i would say.. THAT is the quickest i got something intriguing out of my head.Looking at a more mellow sketch... would be rather a simple deception to the normal eyes. When u crave to hold on to hands tat u had to held onto .. for so long... would at times KILL you.

and running through the head phones were: ....


Kya hua tera waada
Woh kasam, woh iraada
Bhoolega dil jis din tumhe
Woh din zindagi ka aakhri din hoga
Kya hua tera waada
Woh kasam, woh iraada



Perhaps those WERE indeed the best days of my life tat i miss so much... ppl moved on ... to different ppl.. and you are still stuck in those sands of time.. eroding and slipping away...


:) waiting... as always..

UPDATE : this took 600 seconds into the making. Some help from a few references.. and there.. ! :)

Saturday, February 7, 2009

the MOONz evenin walk.. !






Look whose WALKIN !!!... :) Came as a surprise at 4:45 pm IST :) Sp much for the DAY dreamers ...Look out for more from the LenzWatch series .

Device : Nokia n80 3.2 MP
Date : 06-02-09
Time : 1645 hours
Location : Coimbatore

Feel free to comment... even if it is just a "hi" :)
and im waiting for interesing cameras i can use .... for the photographer in me ! :) Pls feel free to mail me.Would be my pleasure to reply..

UPDATE : LensWatch is comin soon on my slideshow too.So u got something interesting to share froum ur lens ? The email link is just arnd the corner :)

Friday, February 6, 2009

... an equivocal monomaniac's pathway to GOD !


"I saw with my eyes open that all the things of the room together with the walls were rapidly whirling and receding into an unknown region, and my I-ness together with the whole universe was, as it were, going to vanish in an all devouring great void. I was then overwhelmed with terrible fear. I knew that the destruction of I-ness was death, so I thought that death was before me, very near at hand. Unable to control myself, I cried out loudly, saying, 'ah. What is it you have done to me? I have my parents, you know."

Wonderin as to wot they mean ? This is the part of a conversation between Ramakrishna paramahansa and his loving disciple Vivekananda.

Vivekananda was an athiest for a beginner and attempted at possessing an attitude tat is rational to answer the many paradigms existing for GOD.He came across to hear abt a divine being at the Dakshineshwar temple who claimed to hav seen and also make a conversation wit GOD himself. After a visit to the temple and meetin him he felt he is speakin to a MONOMANIAC. Vivekananda tried to explain the concept of god in a less complicated way though.

he questioned wit skepticism to find some real answers. Ramakrishna made him sit at the temple .He (ramakrishna) went into a divine mood and touched Vivekananda with his right foot. Immediately Vivekananda had a wonderful experience, which is as above in quoted text ! :)


a realization rushed past me.and i opened my eyes to an experience. This is wot happened a few months back when i sat down for a coffee wit dad ( oh he likes TEA :) .. im the coffee guy ) and wit his abundance in spirituality it struck the right note wit the story he narrated.

and i learnt... GOD is an EXPERIENCE.He comes in as an energy ... a cistern of the immense experience we call LIFE. Sometimes u feel, sometimes u perceive in a thought and most of the time u EXPERIENCE god. it came as a lesson tat i happened to ponder when i made visit to the temple after a long time ... for i got the first signs of me gettin a job admist the global recession.. :) [and tas today though :) ]

Im happy.. and thank you Acha for tat quote u mentioned else i would have been oblivious forever

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Nostalgia... memoirs... and a few TEARS of joy !


Lazing around wit a mellow day... i was upto nothing.was thinking as to wot to do for a blog entry. For the emotional infant in me ... I'm bound to a lot of things touching and emotionally inclined. Always appreciate .

Evening was surprising wit a hand to hold on to and a lot of promise i could only BELIEVE in dreams.Ya believe wit my dream as to wot i believe is wot i wish to make a reality. I love those hands i held and it leaves me wit only these to say : (something i etched in my mind)

Well I was sitting, waiting, wishing
You believed in superstitions
Then maybe you'd see the signs

The Lord knows that this world is cruel

I ain't the Lord, no I'm just a fool
Learning lovin' somebody don't make them love you
ALL THANKS TO JACK JOHNSON ! :)

aaaahh.. i still crave for Ur hands .... still crave to play your fool... still waiting to feel your love... stil waitin to hold those hands and ur mind i dance along in those streams in my dreams :)

still sitin wit the fag end of the smoke.. and feelin the nicotine rush... there came a BLING ring on the phone . It was a text from an old friend of mine. Someone iven seen for almost 14 to 17 years. My first sister who tied a rakhi for me ..First person who made me realise tat BEST friends are for ever.. past the milestones of time and shattering the cliche concept of
OUT OF SIGHT and OUT of SIGHT !:) thank u sister.

Those pics u see at the top are thumbs of some of the best times i had back when i was nothin bigger than a CRICKET bat ... at belgaum , Karnataka... 17 years ago...

Felt the mild pinch of nostalgia when i combined wit Rakesh omprakash's mehra's production wonder DELHI 6 soundtrack ... where u feel the rich essence of RAHMANIA... oh ya .. tas the magic of rahman as many acclaimed critics COINED it ! :) ... oh ya im talking of MASAKALI ! :) listen to it ! :)

and till now I'm still siting .. HIGH on nostalgia and as i type .. i feel the screen go glum wit my eyes going wet and heart going heavy... Thank u Anamika chechi... for those wonderful memoirs to be injected as a lifeline into my life.. when i felt life was strolling low .. waiting for an inevitable crash.. :)

guess i got another leash of life to take it at least a few steps more ... just a few more to find myself..and i wish i were 3 years old..... AGAIN..
guess my eyes are heavy enf to just stop here ...

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

.. And its the 97 !!


Beating recession and coming up wit new age , cutting technology and durable mobile devices, its the Nokia N97 on the shelves this year. Something that impressed me over the outlook is the Sleek design.

Ive this THING for slide phones. Moving on from a NOT so OBSOLETE nokia n80, i was thinking of something new , flashy and something tat can pimp my life. and there.. i couldn't take my eyes off it .

Not many look at the phones tat are sleek but with UNCONVENTIONAL looks.and nokia guys are doing it real good wit the phones ( i still believe that they got the best interface .... Even samsung off late copied an interface similar to Nokia)

It is to hit the shelves by April '09 and i still haven't figured out when its going to be in India.
Here are some of the config and features :

* a 3.5 inch widescreen 16:9 touchscreen
* haptic feedback
* full QWERTY slideout keyboard
* 5 megapixel camera with Carl Zeiss Tessar lens and dual LED flash
* up to 32 GB of storage
* up to 16GB additional memory via microSD
* Symbian S60 5th Edition
* up to 37 hours of music / up to 4.5 hours of video
* A-GPS and GPS
* HSDPA, Wi-Fi, USB 2.0, stereo Bluetooth connectivity
* a 3.5mm headphone jack.

Check out the FULL features here :
http://2009.nseries.com/specs.aspx
http://www.forum.nokia.com/devices/N97

Its termed the phone for the Social networking community for the ease of Use and amazingly designed TOUCHSCREEN for durability. and the Slide too.. its got an inclination stand towards the user. It may look too futile at first, buts trust me .. i saw one in action and it sure looks one DURABLE piece of perfection.Combined wit TOUCH sensitive keys and some cheeky sensors... THIS piece of innovation is going to be on top of my WISHLIST :)

And ya for my readers... Anybody there to gift me one ! ?:) It cost only around 550 euros ( 35k Rs) :)

Also check out the n97 in action in the video feed below from the HORSE's mouth. Mr. Alex Myer was the Design head behind the N97 :

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Destiny... to reach for ; or to give in !


Destiny is a state of realism tat never really shows itself unless it stands the test of time .a Popular definition says :

Destiny refers to a predetermined course of events. It may be conceived as a predetermined future, whether in general or of an individual. It is a concept based on the belief that there is a fixed natural order to the universe.


Destiny indeed plays at time wit the present and brings about weird notions into what holds for the future.Sometimes confusing.. and sometimes heavenly:)


taking an example of Love into consideration , i should say I've had my share of it. First love is always first love.Looking at the dark side.. we get to think about the pain n fear. The human mind has a tendency to state everything bad as FATE.We don't really associate it to a feeling of GOOD times.


So lets clear tat first :


Destiny vs Fate


Although the words are used interchangeably in many cases, fate and destiny can be distinguished. Modern usage defines fate as a power or agency that predetermines and orders the course of events. Fate defines events as ordered or "inevitable". Fate is used in regard to the finality of events as they have worked themselves out; and that same sense of finality, projected into the future to become the inevitability of events as they will work themselves out, is Destiny.


Man is a maker of his DESTINY


We are responsible for what we are, and Whatever we wish ourselves to be, we
have the power to make ourselves. If what we are now has been the result of
our own past actions, it certainly follows that whatever we wish to be in
future can be produced by our present actions; SO WE HAVE TO KNOW HOW TO ACT.

now lets bring in an character who is my favourite in terms of stating DESTINY and reaping the best and worst out of it :) Napoleon Bonaparte.

Napoleon married Joséphine de Beauharnais in 1796, when he was 26; she was a 32-year old widow whose first husband had been executed during the Revolution.

thinking and searching i came across a statement made in the famous movie " the terminal " starring Tom Hanks... which picks and sometimes irks a thought into this.

Do you know wot Napoleon gifted Josephine for her wedding ? .... he gave her a gold pendant wit the words inscribed " TO Destiny ... "
He was a man of honour , trusted her wit all he could in spite of being a ruler wit unsurpassed skills.

Well their story came to a tragic end when he he came to find her affair wit a lieutenant and Things ended there. Term this as fate ?! brings a few questions in our minds.

Things changed over time for the beings on this earth. people are moving on from relationships to casual dating and the changing times even brought in more marriages and divorces increasing exponentially.God knows where these are destined for ! :)

i don't wish to complicate things here. Just to jot the tripe of my mind... and this is wot brought in my thoughts.no matter wot the story begins like ... i still wish to remember those lines from the Shankar - Ehsaan - Loy team... one of their first hits.. a few words in HINDI go as below

aasamaan Ke Paar Shaayad Aur Koi Aasamaan Hogaa Baadalon Ke Parbaton Par Koi Baarish Ka Makaan Hoga Main Hawa Ke Paron Pe Kahaan Ja Raha Hoon Kahaan

[my attempt at translation]

( past the vast expanse of the sky.. there could be another abode of the sky
past the mountains of Clouds there could be another edifice of the rain
sitting on the wings of the wind i wish to go where i haven't known )



and still hoping to finish on a HIGH note... here is a quote to keep waiting.. and waiting for the best

"The longest journey
Is the journey inwards
Of him who has chosen his destiny"
—Dag Hammarskjold (1905-1961)




Monday, February 2, 2009

Sketches... the mind's curves :)




Strolling past an uninteresting life wit indefinite desolation... i happened to stumble across this new found interest to sketch.

Aboulia ... was one of the states experienced amidst the strife to bring emotions on paper.Sometimes i thought i should begin a PHOTO BLOG... got the spark from a friend who asked me to get a jump start on tat.

It all happened on an evening at the age 17. i was having a tough time with the 12h grade. Being into sports... i tried different things to keep me on field.. tat included commitment to practice and giving it the best . well... a few RED marks on the report card and a BROKEN leg definitely left some of the dreams shattered. :) and a few slams on the face too . And then came this indomitable thirst to sketch. ya a THIRST i HAD to quench.At first ... it started as a a dedication.. then it became more n more serious. i gave up food n water to sketch. well.. LITERALLY... cos i felt my emotions demanded much more than food or water.

Are u thinking if I'm gonna b an artist and start a gallery ? he he ... probably u are mistaken. cos i spent so much time n effort into them ... tat it takes me HOURS to finish them(somes even 8 hours at a stretch) and its been only 14 special sketches tat I've completed... in a course of 4 years.. ( ive never really taken any classes into it... its one bunch of emotions there :) )

i gave in the time n effort... but lacked something to carry it ON... as a PASSION. i opened my mind to the realm of sketching... lived the bursts of happiness in it too... but it was all missing something. wot was it ?! still thinking.. living.. exploring and understanding ! :)



maybe i lack PERFECTION to it ... wots ur say on it ?!

Dream... Passion... Potential



Considering the possibility tat a dream can become a reality... and understanding or realizing it as one's inner potential is truly a possibility beyond understanding sometimes.

One might indulge in a variety of actions tat may sometimes divert the mind and at times create enough questions to understand oneself.

I'm a 21 year old engineering student (Barely Engineer for the BE) . I may not have a lot of experience to speak related to a lot of events even barely related to reality. This is just a pursuit of living MY mind ... MY way ... and hopefully realising wot i wish to achieve.

We all have dreams , sometimes obscure beyond minds flexibility. I've had dreams tat have come true. Dreams tat were stepping stones to success ( .. or tats wot i thought) and potential to do things not many could achieve.

Sometimes we think of becoming millionaires. Sometimes its just about leaving everything possess and go on a journey to gain knowledge.Some people TRAVEL... some write ... some LOVE the language... and others FALL in love ! :)

This journey begins here for me . En route to try ... experiment and succeed wit tremendous possibilities of the mind and reach my point of REALIZATION.Lets make everyday an experiment to realise wot v are capable of and wot we love doing :)